The Puppet Mistress
}} Therkla pulls Banjo's strings to prevent Elan's sacrifice. Cast * Elan ◀ ▶ * Durkon Thundershield ◀ ▶ * Qarr ◀ ▶ * Lien ◀ ▶ * Daigo Da- ◀ ▶ * Banjo the Clown ◀ ▶ * Therkla (also as Banjo) ◀ ▶ * chief grukgruk ◀ ▶ * shaman vurkle ◀ ▶ * Grey-Shirted Orc ◀ ▶ Transcript The prisoners are brought to the Orc village where Lien is tied to an alter for sacrifice. Therkla hides in a hut. Daigo: Lien! Thank the Twelve Gods you're still alive. How are you doing? Lien: Questioning the life choices that brought me to this point. You? Daigo: The same, really. Elan: Wow! Banjo, you have your very own altar! I'm so proud! Therkla (whispering): *Squeal!* There he is! How does he look so good tied up? Inside the hut. Qarr: Perfect! A quick quartet of disembowelings, and we'll be ready to take our leave of this fly-infested dump. Therkla: Wait—they're going to kill them all?!? Qarr: Well, duh. That was the point of this mission. Therkla: No! It wasn't!! Therkla: We were going to capture Elan and hold on to him until we could assassinate Hinjo. That way he'd stay safe. Therkla: I mean WE would stay safe. From him. Qarr: Yeah, well, I figured it would be easier to cut to the chase— Qarr: —'chase' in this case meaning "spinal cord"— Qarr: —so I told Grukgruk to sacrifice all four to that stupid puppet. Therkla runs out of the hut. Therkla: Ugh! You horrid little piece of devil crap! Qarr: Geez, what is your problem, mortal? Qarr: No wonder you people need us to tell you how to be Evil, you'd just screw it up on your own. Outside at the altar, Therkla sneaks under the curtain. Elan: Aww, man, Hinjo's gonna be peeved that I got Lien sacrificed to my god. Elan: He'll probably give that stern paladin look to my eviscerated remains. Therkla operates Banjo. Therkla (as Banjo): STOP! vurkle: *gasp!* Elan: Yes! I knew it! Therkla (as Banjo): Yes, it is I, Banjo the Clown, god of puppets! I have seen you orcs worshipping me, and have chosen this moment to make my will known. Therkla (as Banjo): Do not harm the fair human! He is my prophet, and shall not have one silky luxurious hair put out of place! Therkla (as Banjo): Defy me, and prepare to feel my googly eyed wrath! grukgruk unties Elan. grukgruk: as banjo wish, banjo. chief grukgruk release human. vurkle: *sigh* vurkle: shaman vurkle never get to sacrifice anything nice. Elan: Thank you, o mighty Banjo, for sparing my life. It fills me with joy to hear your words...even though it turns out that your voice is a lot deeper than I imagined it. vurkle: what about other humans and the dwarf? they prophet too? Therkla (as Banjo): Huh? Oh, no, I don't really care about them. Kill them, or whatever, I guess. Whatever makes you guys happy. vurkle: hooray! vurkle: sacrifice back on agenda! Lien: Elan! If you're the prophet, SAY something!! Elan: Truly, Banjo giveth with one hand, and taketh away with the other. Lien: ELAN!!! Elan: I think the hand with the banjo is the taketh-ing one. Otherwise he'd pretty much only be able to giveth banjoes. Trivia * In the last panel, Elan paraphrases the Book of Job from the Hebrew Bible, where Job says, "the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away...". External Links * 557}} View the comic * 80679}} View the discussion thread Category:Banjo, God of Orc Island